The Witness

you know, shall we dance me ek dialogue tha where the wife says that

two people share their lives together so that they witness the lives of each other.. this world is so large, there are so many people that each life is insignificant.

to make your life significant you wish there is at least one person who has seen ur life closely, who has witnessed ur ups and downs, ur mood swings, us success and failure,  everything

for past two years, you have been witness of my life... there is no one who knows each and every thing about these two years but you

and i want to  thank you for that.... bec witnessing is not just about observing it is also about tolerating things that you do not like in me, which i am sure are many may be less than the things that you like... 

i differ from u in more than many ways... it is difficult to accept differences but if you do then we will fall short of days that go unnoticed or un-witnessed, which of course is a good thing

when i say i love you, i mean...

let my day start in your arms
how so ever it goes then
i will have no qualms

let me look into your eyes
i want to know all the
reasons of your tears and your smiles

let me talk to you whole day
we will talk no sense but
we will make our dream houses with clay

let me be with you when you are down
i will make all the efforts for your smile
even if i need to be a clown :)

let me hug you and hold you
i know you like that but
how much i like i never told you!

let me be with you all my life
i will love you i promise
we will get rid of our strife :)

Failure

So far, i have never really faced failure in my life... today i did!

Already the day was going really bad, what made it worse was that i wasn't selected for any of the committees... no big deal though but what i dont want to accept is that i worked hard for it and still didn't get through...

the two committees i worked really hard for, both did not select me!

it feels bad... failure sucks!

but still somewhere the voice is there... so what? you'll do better! you will do great! better than the rest.... i want to believe that voice and move on... i so wish, there was someone who could back that voice and tell me, so what? i never felt so low on confidence, never felt so lonely... but may be this is what life is :(

The best relationship...

I am a very possessive kind of a person, not of things, not of belongings but of my dear ones. I always knew that marriage is a huge change and it will take away the most important person from my life... Though I was ready, but alas! i did not know I will keep missing that person so much, for so long...

My mother says you will also forget once you'll be married, i wonder how and i wish i do forget. He has taken care of me like a child, like a sister, like a friend and now suddenly he has stopped being even a friend let alone a brother!

He has a new set of people around him, new relationships to build, i understand that, but still somewhere I fail to justify his forgetting me. I know he cannot juggle between things, he has told me and I did pretend to understand it totally, but i don't :(

He thinks that I am an understanding adult! How has he forgotten how big a dumb I am!! Because it has always been him who guided me, always. Though I can for once understand that he is involved in his life, but I really fail to when I see him treating my younger cousins like he used to treat me!! I know I am elder sister of my cousins too but I don't know how to deal with sth that is inherent in me- possessiveness! I just can't see when he calls my cousin to crack a joke and not me, he pulls leg of my cousins and not mine! Please somebody tell me how to let go of this inherent problem that I have...

I wish I too get married soon, not because I want to but because I do not want to be hurt anymore. I know I am not the best of the sisters but he sure is the best brother! :)

Distance...

due to lack of time, i didnt really work on it... so here it is in exact order as it crossed my mind...

The smell of your skin
was still surrounding me
as you were going
to your abode and leaving me

The warmth of your touch
I still could feel
as i failed to make out
the dream from real

The sound of your breath
slow and deep
was awaking me
in my sleep

But alas! as you go
the merciless distance
takes you away from me
while I lie in a trance...

wat all do i like :)

hey this is my blog... i can write watever i want :P
so let me count wat all things i like a lot, its not in order of preference, its in order it comes to my mind...

-taking a hot water bath during temp<23'C after 11pm
-listening to my fav track when cool wind is blowing and i am walking
-going on long drives in an awesome mausam with nice tracks being played and wind playing with my hairs
-being close to nature
-seeing an infant smile
-feeling loved and cared for
-dancing with my heart when no1's looking
-geting into blanket which is already warm during winter
-being surprised on my bday
-watching my loved ones watching me
-waking up smiling when some1 strokes lovingly my cheeks and hairs
and many more...

you and me :)

A relationship: it is the smile when you see your loved ones after long, the tears in your eyes when you see them departing, the ache you feel when they are sad, the fear you feel when something's going wrong. It is the concern you have for their well-being, the extra-effort you make for their smile, the happiness you feel when you hear their laughter, the prayer you sing when you are unsure, the warmth you feel when they hug you, the love you see in their eyes...